In the past year, Will has come to regard bugs with more fear and apprehension rather than his usual indifference. I feel like I have worked hard to show him that insects are a positive presence in our world, and I generally do not act afraid of insect myself (unless its a giant spider), so I am a little surprised at his sudden fear. The magnitude of it was shown to us recently when Michael played a little joke on Will. He had some M&Ms in one hand and held out both hands to Will and asked Will to pick a hand, intending to give him the candy. Will picked the empty hand and then Michael encouraged him to pick the other instead. Will was adamant that he wanted the empty hand and then Michael asked Will what was in the hand. Will asked, "what?" and Michael replied, "a jumping bug!" and then made a tossing motion with the hand. Will let out a loud scream and ran away a few paces. We both laughed and then Michael gave him the M&Ms. It was a funny little moment, but one that took me a bit by surprise at Will's reaction.
I've never met a kid who talks about death as much as Will does. We have had SO many conversations about it over the years. Tonight as I was about to leave his room, he asked me when he was going to die. I gave him a whole speech about how he was going to live a very long life and how thats why its important to love a lot and have a lot of fun and do all the things you want to do so that by the time you are old, you are ready to die and you don't feel sad about it. How death is normal and everyone dies but that you have to make life count. How he has only lived 4 years and has PLENTY of time to have a nice long life and that he has nothing to worry about. He gave me a tearful hug at the end of all that and I told him that we could talk again any time he liked and to always tell me if he was worrying about something like that. What a tough conversation though! It can be so hard to be honest with kids in age appropriate ways, especially with no advanced preparation!
Last night at dinner we had a sweet conversation. Michael was working late and he told me that he wished that I was a daddy, and that he had two daddies. I told him that if I was a daddy, then I wouldn't be able to have a baby brother in my belly. He said, "and that would make me sad!" Then he said, "I love you mom! And I love Nora too!" Then he made this whole statement about how he loved playing with Nora was glad that Nora was always around to play with him all the time and that before she was born, he was all by himself with no one to play with. It was very sweet and gratifying to hear in words, what I have been observing for the last few months: the two of them (led by Will), playing together better than they ever have, including not fighting and working out disagreements and taking turns. Of course they still have their moments of strife, but on the whole things are generally peaceful and calm between them, especially compared to the violence and chaos that was their relationship just 6-8 months ago! Things have come a long way, in large part I think, due to Will's greater grasp on social skills and growing maturity. I have also noticed that he is paying more attention to relationships at school and has recently made the effort to make new friends there. So all in all, I am proud of all the changes I have seen in William lately!
Comments
Post a Comment